I joined the Thrive Mentorship because I wanted to continue my ongoing journey of self study and renew my commitment to self care to assist in healing my mind, body and spirit which I had neglected my whole life. The teachings for this course/endeavor are ones that I had only touched on prior to this 9 month excursion of the soul. By participating on a more in depth and consistent level, I have discovered how vital all the teachings are in order for me to finally notice and maybe even enjoy my life. I was skeptical and nervous to join in something that was sure to be very personal and make me feel vulnerable. What if I couldn’t do it? What if I didn’t like it? What if I wasn’t good enough? Smart enough? Had nothing to offer? The what if’s of life are endless. What I know about myself is if I sign up, I show up. This mantra holds me accountable and present.
Thrive proved to be more meaningful and poignant than I could have imagined. Self discovery is not fun or easy. However, one of my biggest takeaways from this last 9 months, is the complex yet simple term of “there is no ease in easy.” I’ve spent my life looking for the quick fix, the easy way out, the shortest way through to the other/better side. There is no easy button. There is no better side. There is only this moment. This second. My reality. This statement brought me a sense of relief that I had never known. Wow! Life changing in a big a-ha moment way. The weekly calls really helped me stay present and on task with the assignments, not just to the group, but for myself. The teachings on Buddhism, Ayurveda, Mindset, Enneagram, 4 Desires, Self Compassion and more are still on the forefront of my mind on the daily. I welcomed my curiosity in every week. I was, and still am, so intrigued by all of the teachings. I could continue these calls for the long haul. There were nuggets I was finally able to hear each week. It was so refreshing and life affirming. It was like hitting a reset button each week. A place to pause, contemplate and invite awakening as a new sense of hope suddenly appeared in my life and became clearer each week. Like living with a clean slate.
LO Thrive was the perfect tonic of scheduled self reflection and just what I needed to take my study to the next level of more understanding and integration. This group provided a safe and confidential space to learn and share about life’s struggles and victories. LO Thrive encouraged accountability with the weekly calls which I always looked forward to. It was wonderful to share this experience with a group of like minded and supportive women. Life takes a village after all!
9 Months Later:
I realize I don’t have to know the “how” of getting from point A to point B in life and it doesn’t mean I’m a failure or less than. In fact, quite the contrary. The decision is simply up to me to pursue and discover the “what” and to be open to receiving the “how”. Being receptive, saying yes and allowing small shifts and change to occur, are crucial for personal growth and wellness to transpire. I have been blocked and stuck in a very narrow lane my whole life due to the fear of feeling. Like debilitating fear of feeling anything. I never wanted to rock the boat for fear of all “the feels” that might come rushing my way or bubble up as a result. I didn’t think I could handle it. So, I’d been vigilant, until now, to keep a lid on my life. A person will never find peace by avoiding their life. I decided it was time to participate, remove the lid and allow what unfolded. I don’t want to miss any more of my life.
More so now than ever, I understand that no one taught me how to take care of myself or even to be interested in myself and or what makes me tick. Self care is not selfish. I was ready to take a long look inward and see if I could find a more satisfying way to live my life than coming from a constant place of deficit, anxiety and malaise. It no longer served me to be “sick and tired” all the time of my own life. Another great gem, “What would it look like if it were easy?” What indeed! Wow! I learned to embrace the teachings of “self compassion” and treat myself as I would a friend or family member when stress arises. I’ve become much kinder and more gentle to myself and it’s made a huge difference in how I feel about and see the world. My family has noticed a big shift in my present over perfect attitude. It’s like a 2 ton anvil was lifted from my shoulders. It’s ok to not have the picture perfect holiday if it doesn’t bring me joy. I will continue to work on letting go of my own self imposed set of expectations and limitations. This has been one of the most freeing exercises. If it doesn’t ’t serve you, let it go. I’ve spent so much of my life in my own way. I’ve found my way to make ME a priority in my life to learn, acquire and implement the necessary tools for long lasting change through growth and attention.
At The End:
As we close out of 9 months together, I really want to say how grateful I will forever be for this experience. It has changed me. I have come out on the other side a better version of myself. Thank you doesn’t seem to be enough but it will have to do. As you said at your house the other night P, this will never happen like this again, with this group of people, for this amount of time. It was a lightning a bottle experience and one I wouldn’t trade for anything. Thrive is a part of me. It’s in my cellular makeup and my soul now. I am humbled and honored to have shared this journey with such intelligent, kind, supportive and wise women. I will always be thankful to this group for supporting me on my journey of waking up to my life. Me. Awake. Happy. What a concept! I will miss this weekly treasure that has meant so much.
While it still doesn’t come naturally to me, I have learned to trust myself, value myself and take care of myself more. I remain a work in progress but aren’t we all?!! I am mindful that all of these teachings are essential to living a fulfilling and meaningful life. To feeling my life. I will continue to set my intention to pay attention and stay awake. I have the tools. I will now work on the integration piece of the puzzle in my daily life. I will remember to remember. To start over and over again and again. “The price is high but the reward is great.”
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. . .a lil omm goes a long way.